Tuesday, April 5, 2011


It's amazing the way the flow of your life can change direction almost instantly upon meeting a person. I've experienced it more than a few times, and it isn't always a drastic change, but once in a while...

I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and I recently moved into the boundaries of the Temple View singles ward. From the first Sunday I have attended I have met so many people who have reached out to me and lifted my spirit. It has been an amazing couple of months and I have gained many friendships I truly hope I will carry with me throughout my life. One friendship I have gained, however, has grown exponentially over a very short time and has become as strong as- if not stronger than- any friendship I have ever had.

Ashley, I want you to know what an incredible impact you have had on my life. As I've gotten to know you these past few weeks, I have been completely blown away by the person you are. I know that I've told you much of this, but I want you to hear it over and over again, because I want you to understand and know what a truly beautiful person you are. Every time I say "thank you", your response is "I didn't do anything.", but, what I never say is that I'm not thanking you for what you've done, I'm thanking you for being who you are. The life you live is a complete inspiration to me, and a constant reminder of how I should be living. The way you stare your constant trials in the face and choose instead to worry about what others are going through... I have never met someone who tries so hard to serve everyone they see in need. If you need a second witness of that, look at the fact that the relief society exists at all, that the priesthood brethren are assigned as home teachers. I honestly believe that if everyone had the mentality you have of constantly seeking for ways to lift people in need, there wouldn't be a need for any of it. There have been a few people I have met over the years who I will never forget because they radiated the light of Christ in all that they did. You, Ashley, are one of these people. You are a person who tries to live life with Charity every day. I know you are going to be internally, and possibly physically, shaking your head at everything I'm saying here, but I want you to stop it. Only one person on this planet was ever perfect.

One of my favorite scriptures is Jacob 3:1-2,
But behold, I, Jacob, would speak unto you that are pure in heart. Look unto God with firmness of mind, and pray unto him with exceeding faith, and he will console you in your afflictions, and he will plead your cause...
O all ye that are pure in heart, lift up your heads and receive the pleasing word of God, and feast upon his love; for ye may, if your minds are firm, forever.

These verses mention two prerequisites to feasting upon the love of God forever: Pure heart, and firm mind. I realized when I read this that this has nothing to do with mistakes you make, or sins you commit. "Can you see the difference between who you are and what you've done?" We are the pure in heart, because we seek Christ. We desire in our hearts to be like Him. You helped me to remember this.

Never give up on yourself Ashley. You are one of the most beautiful people I have met in this life, I mean it every time I say it, and I mean it with my whole heart. I hope you know I could not be happier with where you and I are at. We have gone through quite a bit in our short time knowing each other, but the result is a bond I don't ever want to be without. I promise you, I'm here to stay.

"I don't write songs like this because I want to, I write them because I need to."
This song, to me, has become entirely inadequate. It was written when I knew little about you, and little about how deeply and in what way I would feel for you. Regardless, here it is, my heart, one week after meeting you.


I cannot believe what I am feeling
One week deep and I've got every reason
To believe that I've found a greater purpose for my breathing
Suddenly I feel like I am seeing
All my faults and all that I could be
I'm terrified of what this means
Not that I am afraid to be
But knowing now that you might hold the key

Something awoke that first night that I saw you
Something spoke to me that deeply rang true
And for a moment I glimpsed the beauty that's within you
It was in the way that when you smiled your eyes shone
The way they seemed to pierce right down to my core
And as we talked into the night
My heart was quickly keeping time
To the rhythm of the music in your voice

You're beautiful in ways that you don't know
Your beauty lies in things that you don't show
But slowly I am seeing to your soul
Believe me girl I know it's unexpected
I found your heart with walls built to protect it
And like a fool I walked right in
With no regard for what had been
I'm sorry girl I wish I had respected
But you forgave
And we remain
So I will wait
And I will pray

For you to open
Your heart again
Hoping that when you do I'm there
And that I find a way to show you
The way you showed me the way

1 comment:


Beautiful. I have said it once and I will say it again, you have got a pure talent. The way you construct words into verses amazes me, not everyone can do that successfully. I am not sure who you met that has inspired you so much, but whoever she is...keep her around ;)
AND keep writing Ben.